Crossroads

It seems I am at a crossroads in my life.

I have made a choice that puts me in a very unsure position regarding my future. And yet I chose this decision. Time to get out of the comfort zone (again) and start being a responsible adult (again).

I'd have to say last year was one hell of a ride. And I guess because of the things I experienced last year it helped me reach this decision I made. Despite all the ups and downs of last year I have no regrets.

Come to think of it, I really don't. I don't regret changing jobs, despite all the negative things that happened. Moving to the gaming industry in the Philippines just reinforced observations I made during my time in the post-production advertising industry of the Philippines. One, that there are lots of posers out there - many people talk the talk but can't walk the walk. Two, people who can sell themselves end up in better opportunities at first, but eventually they will get their comeupance (or whatever the hell the spelling is). Three, good leaders are hard to find. Four, hard work pays off and important people eventually see your true value. Four, you go to your job because you get paid to do it, making friends is just a bonus. Five, if you don't enjoy what you're doing anymore then it's time to move on. Six, you are paid to do your job / role, never let anything get personal unless someone forces you to make it personal.

Ah, it all seems so negative and bleak. But it's not. These things I just wrote down just emphasizes what I believed in all along.

On a side note, I've been working in 3D fields for the past five years. So far, honestly, I feel as if I've been short-changed. Maybe 3D wasn't the right field to invest in during college. I honestly do not know the answer.

But I do know that I am depressed right now, and that maybe that depression is the reason why I feel like 3D isn't the career for me. I really hope that's it's just depression.

Ah my writing sucks. So incoherent.

Out.

Bring It On (A New PC, I Mean) and Other Ramblings

It is the new year, since last week actually. And how have things been for me so far?

Not bad, to be honest. Not bad.

There are still things that are shaky going on, career-wise. I still don't know if I will still have a job this coming year or if I will also be the victim of the global economic crisis and get retrenched. But since no news is (sorta) good news, then I guess everything's gravy.

That doesn't mean that I don't have any backup plans. Or backups anyway. I must acquire a portale storage device of huge proportions - a 300gb portable hard drive. My PC is just waiting it's replacement, and right now I am blogging on my mother's old PowerBook. I need to back-up my work files, mp3s, and other important stuff from my old PC (and maybe my office PC) so that in the event that the new PC arrives, I will have 2 working PCs.

But wait, you're thinking, "How can you have 2 working PCs when you just implied that your current PC is no longer reliable? (Which it is... it is NOT reliable)" Well I still have my very 1st P4 PC somewhere in the house. I will cannibalize it for it's mobo and try to have my current PC's RAM, video card, power supply, DVD-writer, and hard drives connected to that one so I can have one relatively slow PC and a newer, faster one. The old PC I will most likely either give away to my relatives in the province who can use it for clerical duties, or I will give it to someone else. Or I can keep it, buy myself a switcher, and use 2 PCs using only one monitor, keyboard, and mouse. Whatever.

I've decided to go AMD Phenom X4. It is about 2/3 cheaper than a Pentium of the same speed. Plus I'm not too keen on getting Pentiums anymore since I didn't really get to use my old PC for income generating purposes. Thus defeating the need for getting expensive hardware. If I do find a way to make some extra moolah using my new PC at least I'll recoup my expenses sooner. If I don't, at least I didn't spend that much.

So that's it. Why did I post this? Because I want to be more active with my blog. I'm considering being a bit more open to the blog again, maybe with work. But then I don't want to sound like I'm a bitch about the stuff going on at work.

All I can say is that I miss post-prod TVC work. I guess I just needed a break from it from before, and a one year sabbatical seems just right.

Don't get me wrong, gaming is great and all. But I am just not impressed with the gaming industry in the Philippines. Maybe if I was working in the US or Canada for a major game company I'd be enjoying myself a lot more. But gaming here isn't what I expected.

For one thing we've been working on low-poly models. Mostly for the Nintendo DS. Nothing wrong with that, I have learned new things. But the excitement and the challenges I got used to doing before when I used to make TVCs just aren't here in gaming. I don't know why.

I still get challenged in gaming, but it's just not the same feel as with TVCs. It's just totally different.

But I'm still glad for everything that I have experienced. Because they all helped me out one way or another.

That's enough of that ramble.

Out.

Happy New Year

It's a new year, 2009. And yes, the number of posts I made last year continued to drop. Do I plan on doing anything to change this? Well I hope so. I will keep posting as long as I have ideas. And as long as I have the means to post.

I need a new PC. Desperately. My old one is just a goner. I tried reformatting it and it still sucks. Even worse than before the reformat. Tsk tsk. And this time when I do get a new PC I will make sure I have someone else assemble it for me and install the software. No more Mr. Do-It-Yourself. I'll probably just screw it up.

Well it is a new year, and I am looking forward to new challenges and new experiences. Gotta make this year better than last year.

And I have writer's block.

Out.